Hi, you suck

No, not you dear friends and/or family that by chance might read this?

Nope referring to this girl.. yup pointing at me. Question for ya'll what do I do for a living? If you maybe answered bake cakes, give yourself a nice pat on the back cause I do. This means that obviously when people have birthdays I step up and usually offer/are expected to make a cake. Well since the parental ones are coming to Massachusetts this weekend and since my big sis's birthday is next weekend I decided I would make her cake this week. No worries this story does have a twist just setting the scene. Well I have this chocolate buttermilk cake that is pretty much to die for so I figure I'll make that today. Well somewhere between me making it and taking it out of the oven something when terribly wrong. Like hot mess wrong. As in super flat, super dense nastiness. Well not complete nastiness I tasted it, eh it was okay, or at least edible but not exactly "HAPPY BIRTHDAY" ish if you know what I mean. So this would just not do, googled a recipe for Baker's Unsweetened Chocolate Cakes and found a super one bowl recipe... well it's going in the oven so hopefully for Katie's sake it comes out. If not totally going to go and by a mix cake. Oh yea and I made some d-e-lightful Almond Poundcake. Yup googled that shit too. Seriously off topic, what did we do before google? Other off topic anyone remember Encarta? What ever happened to that? Hmmmm something to ponder while watching the cake bake.. Anyway back on topic, the recipe for poundcake called for Lemon Extract, well I didn't have any and instead had some Almond, probably left over from Christmas soooo I got it done. Wow that was a boring little side story and I apologize for that few seconds of your life you will not get back. Alrighty then.. here's to baking! Oh and not being a complete S.A.L

get it?

no?

Okay .... S.A.L = Suck at Life :)

40 Day Dream

Seeing as how nothing terribly humorous happened in all the excitement that is Whole Foods on a Monday I thought I would share an old story that could be considered funny. So when I first moved down here I needed to get a hair cut. Not knowing really where to go and not wanting to spend tons of money, I called the first place that popped up when I googled my area. Well after driving around for around fifteen minutes looking for the place I finally gave up and decided to stop at "Janae's Salon". Heck it looked nice from the outside... well little did I know that I did not sport the right type of hair to get it done there. Yup definitely walked in and was the only white girl under 45 in the place. Besides that there was only one woman doing hair and four people under the dryers... so she asked
"What can I do for you hun?"
To which I responded "well I wanted to see if you had time to do a haircut, but I see your busy"
"Well I don't have time today but you can check anastasia down the street"
"Yup I can see that, thank you"

Uh saweet nothing like a little case of insert foot in mouth disease! My favorite.

Sugar Magnolia

I really love it when you get proof positive that you not only have a great sense of humor buuut you know how to use it. The sis came out to visit last night so that we could see the latest Gary Marshall rom com Valentine's Day. Personally one of my favorite part of going to the movies is the previews. Well for this particular movie there was a preview for Get Him to the Greek, Jonah Hill's latest raunchy comedy coming out sometime soon. In case you don't know he is well known for other movies such as Knocked Up and Superbad. Granted this aren't cinematic masterpieces but they are usually funnier than shit. So Kate and I are sitting there pretty much peeing our pants, silent laughing our asses of. What is funny about this situation is that I'm pretty sure we were the only two people laughing in the entire movie theater. This has only happened to me one other time and that was many moons ago when Robbie Jay and I went to see The Bad News Bears with Billy Bob Thorton. Umm funny, funny stuff. Yup only two people laughing their asses off.

Again proof positive that you are a funny person. That is all. In the words of Heidi Klum "auf wiedersehen"

Goodbye My Almost Lover

Sooooo first and foremost, this is not meant to offend anyone. Literally it's just my observations on life and then I put my spin on things. So here it goes.

Went to the Furthur concert last night. Furthur is a band comprised of Bob Weir and Phil Lesh (founding members of the Grateful Dead) and some other people. Basically they play all Dead songs and a few from their own offshoots Rat Dog and Phil and Friends I guess. Either I have not done enough drugs or I like bathing and being in the now waaay too much. I just don't get it. Why do grown men think it's okay to stuff themselves into Tie-Dyed Shirts?! When did spastic pelvic thrusts become dancing?! When did it become socially except able to just not bathe?! Okay I can respect the massive repetoire of music these guys have created throughout their musical lifetime. Hits like Scarlet Begonias, Uncle Tom's Band and countless others have been covered and recovered so many times that my first encounter with Scarlet Begonias was through Jimmy Buffet.  I guess I just don't get the cult like vibe at these stereotype driven events. Does it making you better than me because you have seen "the dead" twenty seven times? Uh no, I haven't even been alive that long? Once is enough for me, thanks.

Further, I do believe this is the end of the man child. The concert was our last planned "hang out" and it kind of felt like the closing credits. I mean clearly he felt comfortable enough to lean over to me prior to the show starting and say "Further is spelled Furth-Ur, I saw your facebook status and you spelled it wrong". Really?! Is that necessary?! Well seeing as how you, and maybe two other people will even know what I'm talking about, I think we are safe. Oh besides the fact that this is coming from a kid who has spelled Ithaca, Ithica soooo many times I almost started counting. But since I am a reallly nice girl I filtered the urge to say something and instead am ranting about it on here. One last thing then I'm done. Do you really need to send me a text message with the set lists? I'm sitting right next to you dip shit. That one I had to say something about. To which there was the token shoulder shrug and I don't know response.

On that note, Goodbye!